Well Howdy Doody to all my chums.
When somebody has cheesed me off and I don’t really want to be rude to them I just visualise this old song in my mind and it cheers me up no end:
“May the bird of paradise fly up your nose
And an elephant caress you with his toes”
I am trying to stay light hearted, and I’m sure you will have heard this from me before but I definitely have that SAD wotsits. I quite like the months up to Christmas with the trees all turning beautiful colours, with bright icy days and Christmas itself is one of my favourite times of year. But after Christmas, oh boy. Where it does nothing else but rain for forty days and forty nights* is enough to see me with my own personal rain cloud above my head.
*Might be a slight exaggeration but it bloody feels like it.
I am definitely looking into warmer climes for the first three months of the year in future.
So where has Chairman Ted been this month? How about this:
Chelmsford – Aerospace systems
Dunstable – DPD
Bodmin – CNC Wood manufacturing facility
Launceston – Abattoir
Bristol – Undisclosed location
Colchester – Laboratory equipment manufacturer
Hemel Hempstead - Vending machine manufacturer
When teaching and training is part of your job we get to meet all sorts of people. Mostly humans are easy-going and like to have a laugh. Sometimes we get people who may appear to be miserable but are just nervous when out of their comfort zone. And sometimes we have people who are just downright miserable and don’t want to be in attendance no matter what.
I know I shouldn’t get annoyed with people like this, particularly as a professional in this field but its annoying on several levels. Firstly, there are people who would bust a gut to get on the courses that I deliver and you are taking up their space. Secondly, and I will have to disagree with Michael Jackson on this, but one bad apple can spoil the whole bunch.
Changing tack, with regard to footwear, it’s a funny old world isn’t it? To walk over muddy ground you put on boots with a great big tread for grip. Only problem is the tread fills up with mud and after a few steps you can’t pick your feet up anymore!
Talking of footwear, I like watching the plasterers on site using stilts. Click on the link and have a shufti here:
Plastering on stilts - plastering guru
I wondered what the view of the Health & Safety Executive was on this and to my surprise they say its fine “provided there has been training, the operator is competent and they are used on a flat non-slippery surface”. Well I’ll be jiggered!
To be fair though, there are a lot of myths about the HSE. Like when schools said conkers were forbidden by the HSE. When in fact they had said nothing of the sort. It was just incompetent head teachers making up stories (nothing different there then). The HSE never banned conkers and they also added “We do not, and never have, required children to wear goggles to play conkers."
I must say though, if I had that skill of using stilts as a young man, I wouldn’t have been able to resist wearing them out on a Saturday night round town.
Although we tend to curse H&S, the workplace is now a much safer place than it ever was. When I first started work a widely used “Working at Height” aid was often a plastic beer crate. Oh, the good old days…
After my “Desert Island Discs” selection for December, I challenged my old mate Chris Jones to give me his, just in case he was ever invited on the programme instead of me…
I’m doing his in true Sunday evening “Pick of the Pops” style counting down to his No 1. So straight in at No 10:
10) Stairway to heaven - Led Zeppelin
Led Zeppelin - Stairway To Heaven (Live at Earl's Court 1975) [Official Video]
9) Won’t get fooled again – Who
The Who - Won't Get Fooled Again (Shepperton Studios / 1978)
8) Good vibrations - Beachboys
GOOD VIBRATIONS (HD) THE BEACH BOYS
7) Father and son - Cat Stevens
Yusuf / Cat Stevens - Father & Son
6) Sledgehammer- Peter Gabriel
Peter Gabriel - Sledgehammer (HD version)
5) Uptown Top Ranking – Althea and Donna
Althea & Donna - Uptown Top Ranking
4) Nights in white satin – Moody Blues
The Moody Blues - Nights In White Satin (1968)
3) Another brick in the Wall – Pink Floyd
Pink Floyd - Another Brick In The Wall, Part Two (Official Music Video)
2) One day like this – Elbow
1) Here comes the sun – Beatles
The Beatles - The Beatles - Here Comes The Sun (Official Music Video) [2019 Mix]
I think Mr Jones is a lot more of a music connoisseur than I will ever be. Chris went to music festivals at the Isle of White when it was completely new, he has seen most bands live and he is even completely up to date with modern music.
The bloke is a walking encyclopaedia of popular musical knowledge. Ask him any question about popular music from late 50’s up to present day and he will know the answer.
He completely puts me to shame as I stopped listening when they kicked Dave Lee Travis off Radio 1!
Oh well, time to saddle up for my next adventures.
Happy trails folks, and remember to keep your six-shooter clean, well-oiled and ready for action.